Sylvester Stallone's son was found dead.
I guess we have a good plot for the next Rambo movie now.
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Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
What did God say when he made the first niggers?
Oops! Burnt another one!
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Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11... a suicide.
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I was walking down the street to a video store last night to rent a porno movie when I saw a woman being raped.
Saved myself a fiver.
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A couple has been married for many years, and one day the man tells his wife that he wishes she had bigger breasts.
"But how am I going to get bigger breasts?" she asks.
"That’s simple." he says, "Just rub your breasts with toilet paper every day."
"And that would do it?" the surprised wife wonders.
"Well," answers the husband, "it sure did work on your behind!"
Q: What's the best thing about a blowjob from an Ethiopian?
A: You know they'll swallow.
Chuck Norris does not open doors.
Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
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Little Johnny walked into the house covered in filth.
His mom asked, "Johnny, why do you always get so dirty?"
Johnny replied, " I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are."
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Jacob: Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses to school?
Leonard: Why?
Jacob: She had bright students!