Yo Momma's house is so small you have to go outside to change your mind.
What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead black person in the road? There’s skid marks in front of the skunk.
There was a burning building with a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde at the top. The firemen are yelling to the redhead to jump into a blanket and she jumps off the building and right as she was about to safely hit the blanket they moved it and she dies. They yell to the brunette to jump but she says,"No I saw what you did to the redhead"! They shout we don't like redheads! So the brunette jumps and sure enough they move the blanket and she dies. Then they shout to the blonde to jump off into the blanket. But the blonde says,"no I saw what you did to them"! They shout we don't like them! The blonde then says, "I don't trust you guys, put the blanket on the ground and step back!"
Why is there always hot water at childbirth? In case of a stillbirth, soup.
I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!
Yo mama's so fat that when she goes walking on the beach in heals she strikes oil.
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
About 4,000 years ago: God: "I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!" Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note* God: "Correction, I shall create a great flood!"
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
Teacher: To which family does the elephant belong? Pupil: I don’t know, nobody I know owns one!