Chuck Norris once wrestled an Alligator. He walked away with a new set of luggage.
Yo' Mama is so skinny, her nipples touch.
Why did the skunk buy four boxes of tissues? Because he had a stinking cold.
A mean horseman went into a saddler's shop and asked for one spur. "One spur?" asked the saddler. "Surely you mean a pair of spurs, sir?" "No, just one," replied the horseman. "If I can get one side of the horse to go, the other side is bound to come with it!"
How do bulls drive their cars? They steer them.
Billy was excited about his first day at school. So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after class started, he realized that he desperately needed to go to the bathroom. So Billy raised his hand politely to ask if he could be excused. Of course the teacher said yes, but asked Billy to be quick. Five minutes later Billy returned, looking more desperate and embarrassed. "I can’t find it," he admitted. The teacher sat Billy down and drew him a little diagram to where he should go and asked him if he will be able to find it now. Billy looked at the diagram, said "yes" and went on his way. A short while later he returned to the class room and said to the teacher "I still can’t find it." Frustrated, the teacher asked Tommy, a boy who had been at the school for awhile, to help Billy find the bathroom. So Tommy and Billy left the classroom together and five minutes later they both return and sat down at their seats. The teacher asked Tommy "Well, did you find it?" Tommy was quick with his reply. "Oh sure, he just had his boxer shorts on backwards."
Chuck Norris has sneezing allergies in the mid-to-late fall. This time is typically referred to as hurricane season.
What did the judge say when the skunk was on trial? Odour in court.
Chuck Norris named his parents.
What do you get if you cross a skunk and an owl? A bird that stinks but doesn't give a hoot.