Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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has 53.15 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Knock knock. Who's there? Sarah. Sarah who? Sarah problem here?
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has 53.15 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock
Once upon a time in a nice little forest, there lived an orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. By a surprising coincidence, both were blind from birth. One day, the bunny was hopping through the forest, and the snake was slithering through the forest, when the bunny tripped over the snake and fell down. This, of course, knocked the snake about quite a bit.”Oh, my,” said the bunny, “I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’ve been blind since birth, so I can’t see where I’m going. In fact, since I’m also an orphan, I don’t even know what I am.” “It’s quite OK,” replied the snake. “Actually, my story is much the same as yours. I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never knew my mother. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and find out what you are, so at least you’ll have that going for you.” “Oh, that would be wonderful” replied the bunny. So the snake slithered all over the bunny, and said, “Well, you’re covered with soft fur, you have really long ears, your nose twitches, and you have a soft cottony tail. I’d say that you must be a bunny rabbit.” “Oh, thank you! Thank you,” cried the bunny, in obvious excitement. The bunny suggested to the snake, “Maybe I could feel you all over with my paw, and help you the same way that you’ve helped me.” So the bunny felt the snake all over, and remarked, “Well, you’re smooth and slippery, and you have a forked tongue, no backbone, and no balls. I’d say you must be French”
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has 53.15 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
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has 53.07 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.
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has 53.07 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The teacher had given the class an assignment. He stressed the importance of this particular assignment, and that no excuses would be accepted except illness or a death in the immediate family. A smart-ass student pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion, sir?" The class breaks up laughing, and when they settle down the teacher responds with: "Well, I guess you'll have to learn to write with your other hand."
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has 53.07 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: death, family, school, sex, teacher
Three kids were smoking behind the shed. "My dad can blow smoke through his nose!" boasted the first. "Ha, mine can blow smoke through this ears!" countered the second boy. "That’s nothing," piped up the third. "My dad can blow smoke through his arse. I know,‘cos I’ve seen the nicotine stains on his undies."
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has 53.07 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dad, fart, kids, weed
Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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has 53.07 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris
Q: In the Navy, how do they separate the men from the boys? A: With a crowbar.
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has 53.07 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: military
Yo mama's feet are so ashy, it looks like she kicks flour for a living.
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has 53.04 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: age, insulting, life, Yo mama
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