Terrorists have hijacked a planeload of lawyers bound for a legal convention.
They’ve threatened to start releasing the lawyers one by one until their demands are met.
Chuck Norris invented black.
In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light.
Except pink.
Tom Cruise invented pink.
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How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred?
On the fingers!
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Q: Why is it good to have a Jewish car?
A: It can stop on a dime, and pick it up for you too!
Chuck Norris can speak French in Russian.
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Devil stays in hell because he knows Chuck is around, here on earth.
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If Chuck Norris says his opinion on somthing, it automaticlly becomes a fact.
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Chuck Norris can keep up with the Kardashians.
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This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He
decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her.
When he looked in his
mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing
herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man"
So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again,
but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it
out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in
bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his
clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I
need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
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