Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter?
A: You would think R but it is the C that love.
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Q: What did one casket say to the sick casket?
A: Is that you coughin'?
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It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom:
“Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing.
” Twenty minutes later there was another announcement:
“Will the nine hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class.”
A German woman is walking down the street.
Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her.
She screams, "Nein!, Nein"
So two guys walk away.
Luke: Why did the M&M go to school?
Stan: I’m stumped.
Luke: Because he really wanted to be a Smartie!
I'm like happy meal.
"Coz you are small and pretty?"
"No, coz I always c*m with a toy inside.
Chuck Norris once won a chess game after losing his king
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