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No time for gym? Please tell me how you watch 3 hours of TV every night.
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‘A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.’ Bob Hope
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Q: What is a sheep's favorite sport? A: Baaasket baaall!
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How does herpes leave the hospital? On crotches.
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UV rays are caused by Chuck Norris' smiles.
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Q: What is height of Stupidity? A: A man looking through a keyhole of a glass door.
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Q. Why did Mrs. Smokey the Bear divorce Smokey the Bear? A. Because every time she got hot, he d beat her with a shovel!
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How can you tell if a porno was made in the 70's? The guys' schlongs have sideburns!
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Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung? A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!
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Q: Why did the referee stop the leper hockey game? A: There was a face-off in the corner.
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