How do Chinese people name their kids?
Throw a spoon down the stairs.
CHING CHANG CHONG TING.
What do you call it when someone farts in a Gay Bar?
Mating call
A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.
Roses are red
violets are blue.
I hate poems
even more than I hate you.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups with his beard.
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A woman was standing naked, looking herself at the mirror.
She was not satisfied with what she was looking at and said to her husband: "I feel awful. I look old, fat, and ugly. I really need a compliment right now."
Her husband replied: "Your vision is perfectly nice!"
...and then the fight started.
Facebook is like a fridge, you keep checking it and nothing has changed.
In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
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Q: What is a snake's favorite subject in school?
A: Hissssstory.
They say sex is a killer...
Do you want to die happy?
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