Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
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What is a cow's favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
Q: Why are men like diapers?
A: They are always on your ass and full of sh*t, and thankfully, they're disposable.
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Q: How do you recycle a condom?
A: Turn it inside out and shake the f**k out of it.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
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What did one skunk say to another?
And so do you.
What do you call a show full of lions?
The mane event.
Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
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Yo' Mama is like a bag of chips: Fri-to-lay.