Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
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Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
Q: Why do blondes have more fun?
A: They are easier to keep amused.
Yo mama so fat when she walked out in August in her yellow sun dress and the kids said mommy its time for school.
Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Yo mama is so fat, when she's on an elevator, she has to go down!
Yo mama is so stinky that she scared the fly's off the shit wagonrn.
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Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear.
The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
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My kids get along great when they're sleeping.
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are wandering through the desert, hungry and hallucinating, when they come upon a rotting, dead camel.
"Well," said the Englishman, "I support the Liverpool football club, so I'll eat the liver."
"I support the Hearts club," said the Scotsman, "so I'll eat the heart."
"I support Arsenal," said the Irishman, "but I seem to have lost my appetite."
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