Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding. Chuck gave him a warning.
Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.
They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
Chuck Norris can piss into Gale force winds.
Chuck Norris can travel back in time into the future.
Q: What do you call Santa Claus with muscles? A: Mr. XMass