Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds?
Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.
Teacher: Who succeeded the first President of the USA?
Class: The second one!
If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
Vote:
Q) What do you call a dog with no legs?
A) It doesn't matter, he won't come!
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
Vote:
Dear Chuck Norris,
Could you please close the door of your refrigerator.
Thank you,
Europe
Vote:
Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars.
The last one was called the Hindenburg.
Vote:
Whats the difference in a seagull and a babys diaper?
A seagull flits across the shore and a baby shits across the floor.
Yo Momma SO STUPID WHEN THEY SAID THAT IT IS CHILLY OUTSIDE, SHE WENT OUTSIDE WITH A BOWL AND A SPOON.
Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race.
One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds."
The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record."
So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."