Question: What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
Answer: Pregnant.
Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds?
Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.
Teacher: Who succeeded the first President of the USA?
Class: The second one!
If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
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Q) What do you call a dog with no legs?
A) It doesn't matter, he won't come!
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
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Dear Chuck Norris,
Could you please close the door of your refrigerator.
Thank you,
Europe
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Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars.
The last one was called the Hindenburg.
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Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
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Facebook hides it's privacy from Chuck Norris.
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