Yo momma’s so fat, she has to use a lawn chair instead of a Thigh Master.
Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
In an African city, there was a club that all its members had long dicks. On the other day, an European guy went to register his name in that club. When he knocked the doorkeeper asked the guy's penis length the guy said: "Mine is 10 inches long" The caretaker appeared at the door and begun laughing: "Here isn't a suitable place for you." The porter said, "Look at me I 've turned three time my dick around my waist so I'm only a caretaker and you by a baby dick."
Q: If a man crashes his car into a woman who's fault is it? A: Well what was the man doing driving in the kitchen...
How do you get a nigga out of a tree? Cut the rope.
Good: Your daughter has got a new job. Bad: As a call girl. Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients. Very ugly: She makes more money than you.
Q: What u call 10 black people in the back of a truck? A: A good days hunting.
Chuck Norris is the only person who could truly judge a book by its' cover.