When Chuck Norris eats teddy grahams, he craps out grizzly bears.
Chuck Norris can read an eye chart with his eyes closed.
If you want a list of Chuck Norri's enemies, just check the extinct species list.
How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink.
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
The Terminator said, "I'll be back" because he saw Chuck Norris was coming.
Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job? A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
Chuck Norris jumped off a building once. The ground didn't make it.
Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!