In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks your ass.
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I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears.
What am I?
Ugly!
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If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
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Prostitute 1: Tonight's my night I can smell c**k in the air.
Prostitute 2: Oh, sorry. I burped.
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Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
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Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
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If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be?
Chocolate filled.
Q: How many Anglicans or Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They always use candles.
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Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: To get a root canal.
My eyelids are so sexy, I can't keep my eyes off them.