Best jokes ever

What did the baby dolphin do when he didn't get his way? He whale-d.
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Q: How do you wake up Lady gaga? A: Poke her face.
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More jokes about: music, women
Yo Mama's so ugly, I can f**k her in any position and it'll still be doggie-style.
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If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, internet
CEO frequently overheard mumbling, "Eeny, meeny, miney, moe." Windows XP shutdown screen reads, "It is Now Safe to Start Looking for Work." Company softball team downsized to chess team. Company president now driving a Hyundai. Giant yard sale in front of corporate headquarters.
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What's a moo hoo for a cattle dinner? Cow chow.
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Chuck Norris has only one friend on Facebook: Pain.
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Chuck starts the new year by roundhouse kicking the old one.
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Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.
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What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys? Rhesus Pieces.
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More jokes about: animal, disgusting