Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
Two protons walk into the bar and run into each other. One of them falls down. "Are you OK?" asks the other. "I think so," says the proton. "You sure?" the other asks. "Yeah," says the proton..."I'm positive."
Two blonds were driving to Disneyland. The sing said: Disneyland Left. So they started crying and headed home.
How does the LAPD play poker? Four clubs beat a king.
Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
Why did Tom come home drunk and leave his clothes on the floor? He was in them.
Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract.
Law of Cat Composition A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.
Slut - "I hate you bitch" Blonde - "Your such a slut, I bet your naked under those clothes."
There were once 3 blondes stranded on a deserted island, and could not think of a way to get off it. One of them tripped over what happened to be a magic lamp. Dusting it off, the genie came out. "I will grant you each a wish," he said. "Why not," thought the blondes. "It's worth a try." "I want to be the world's best swimmer," one said, "so I can swim off of the island". She then jumped in to the ocean and swam away. "I want to be a bird," one said, and flew away immediately. The third and last blonde thought for a while. "I want to be a man." She was instantly transformed into a man, and she walked over the bridge to the mainland.