A man was fishing in the jungle. After a while another angler came to join him. "Have you had any bites?" asked the second man. "Yes, lots," replied the first one, "but they were all mosquitoes."
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
Chuck Norris has only played Pacman twice, and beat the game both times. The ghosts were too afraid to leave their little box to try to stop him.
Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag. Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
Little Johnny: „Mom, can I get a dog at Christmas, please?" Mother: „No, you'll be getting turkey, like every year!"
What do you call 35,000 men with their hands up? "Iraqi Army."
Mexicans cross the border 1...2...and 4 at one time, never 3. why? Because the sign says - no tres passing.
Chuck Norris lit a match and ended the Cold War.
How do Chinese people name their kids? Throw a spoon down the stairs. CHING CHANG CHONG TING.