Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in 'manslaughter'.
There was no Big Bang. Chuck Norris arm wrestled himself and the energy produced created the universe.
Chuck Norris became famous when he coached the American rugby and America won the fifa world cup.
Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
Chuck Norris donated his heart to a hospital... twice.
Chuck Norris doesn't pick up his food to eat it. He commands it to enter his mouth.
Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow? You just don't follow him that close!
Superman is faster then a speeding bullet. Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
Chuck Norris has clicked the unclickable button... twice
A watched pot boils instantly for Chuck Norris.