Q: Why do men take showers instead of baths? A: Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
"What is love, at last?" asks the dentist. And the cardiologist: "Love is a toothache.. but inside the heart!"
How does a man save a woman from being attacked on the street at night? He controls himself.
Yo' Mama is like ass hair: totally useless and full of sh*t.
I just watched a squirrel bury a nut in my front yard. I'm going to dig it up and replace it with a Cadbury egg. That'll blow his little mind.
Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
Yo' Mama is so old, she has sour cream in her boobs.
Yo' Mama is so flat, the last time she felt a breast was in a KFC bucket.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she smashed open her TV hoping to find a TV dinner.
Yo' Mama is so fat, when she did a cartwheel, she kicked an angel in the nuts.