The best animal jokes

How do you make a small fortune out of horses? Start off with a large fortune!
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I saw some ducks practicing their teenage girl faces at the pond today.
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Q: Why does a dog stay in a shadow. A: Because it doesn't want to be a Hotdog.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.
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Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.
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What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties? "Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
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What's a moo hoo for a bunch of weirdo cattle? A nerd herd.
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What's a moo hoo for a cattle dinner? Cow chow.
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In what state will you find the most cows? Moo York.
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What is a moo hoo for the bucket that goes at the back end of the cow? A tail pail.
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