When should you feel sorry for a skunk?
When its spray pump is out of order!.
What did the slug say as he slipped down the window very fast?
How slime flies.
Your mamas feet are so scaly you can see crocodile dundy in her foot bath.
Q: What does an elephant use as tampon?
A: A sheep.
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Why was the cannibal looking peeky?
Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!
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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, finally the bear says, "excuse me ,do you have problems with crap sticking to your furr when you go?"
The rabbit replies, "WHY NO".....so then the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
A woman walks into a bar with her 5 pound Chihuahua and sits down next to this guy, whom she notices is feeling a little bit queasy.
A few minutes go buy and the guy looks at her and blows his chunks.
He looks down and sees the little dog struggling in a pool of vomit and says, "Whoa, I don't remember eating that!"
When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
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Q: What is a duck's favorite TV show?
A: The feather forecast!