The best animal jokes

Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth. The next day he won the lottery.
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has 47.63 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, money
There's a guy Who's hiking in the woods one day when a bear chases him up a really tall tree. The bear started to climb the tree, so the guy climbed up higher. Then, the bear climbed down and went away. So the guy starts to climb down the tree. Suddenly, the bear returns, and this time he's brought an even bigger bear with him. The two bears climb up the tree, the bigger bear going higher than the first. But the guy climbed even higher still, so the bears couldn't reach him. Eventually, the bears went away. Naturally quite relieved, the guy starts down the tree again. Suddenly, the two bears return. But this time the guy knew he was in big trouble. Each bear was carrying a BEAVER.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal
Teacher: Billy, how do you spell "Crocodile"? Billy: ‘K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' Teacher: No, that's wrong Billy: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, school, teacher
Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.
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has 47.46 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, dog
What do you call a cow that fell in a hole? A hole-y Cow.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat? To the calf-ateria.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire? A bunny with money.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
How do snails get their shells all shiny? They use snail polish.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
Three mice in a pub having a bevy discussing who's the hardest. 1st mouse says I'm the hardest I go up to mousetraps rip the cheese out and as the bar comes down i bench press it 30 times and throw it across the room! 2nd mouse says : you poof! I get rat poison' crush it into powder and snort it. 3rd mouse finishes his drink, gets up and walks to the door, where are you going? asked the other 2. Home he replied to shag the cat!
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a carrier pigeon? A bird who knocks before delivering its message !
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, work
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