How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have YOU ever seen a rabbit with glasses?
Q) What do you call a dog with no legs? A) It doesn't matter, he won't come!
Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
Q: Why can't you take a turkey to church? A: Because they use such FOWL language.
How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost!
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, the pigeons throw her bread.
Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!
What magazine makes cows stampede to the newsstand? Cows-mopolitan!