Law of Cat Composition A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.
‘Cats have nine lives. Which makes them ideal for experimentation.’
Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At Night.
A New Zealander walking along the road with a sheep under each arm. He meets another New Zealander who says "you sheerin' mate?" and the first guy replies "naw, they're all mine"
Q: What is it called when a soldier slips into a fox hole? A: Bestiality
Q: How does a redneck tell the difference between a bull and a cow in the dark? A: He sticks his nose in the animal's ass. If there's a place for his tongue, it's a cow.
Q. Why don't lions eat clowns? A. Because they taste funny.
Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
You momma so stupid I see her walking the pigs down the street I'd asked "What she doing?" And she said "Going piggy back riding"!
Q: What is a duck's favorite TV show? A: The feather forecast!