Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey. He chews bees...
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
Q: What does a cow make when the sun comes out? A: A shadow.
That bull you sold me is a lazy good-for-nothing. I told you he was a bum steer.
Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat? To the calf-ateria.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: Laughing stock.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire? A bunny with money.
Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.