How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry it.
Q. Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat?
A. Because he was pissed off!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
A young lawyer was working on a farmer’s case, which asked compensation from the train company because one of they’re trains killed 24 pigs of his.
At the High Court, wanting to make impression of the damage amount, the lawyer says:
There were 24 pigs gentlemen!
Twice as much than you!
What happens when you kiss a canary?
You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties?
"Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
That bull you sold me is a lazy good-for-nothing.
I told you he was a bum steer.
Where did the mooron take the baby cow to eat?
To the calf-ateria.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a millionaire?
A bunny with money.
Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back?
They re always switching their tails.