The best animal jokes

There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods... Cats have never forgotten this. Here's proof that Cats are smarter than dogs... You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God! Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.My husband said it was him or the cat... I miss him sometimes. Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What do you get if you mix a rabbit and a snake? A: A jump rope!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why does a dog lick himself? A: He can't make a fist.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do rabbits put in their computers? Hoppy disks.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, computer
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a boy scout? A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across the street.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, old people
A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, time
What happened to the frog's car when his parking meter expired? It got toad!!
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
What color socks do bears wear? (They don't wear socks, they have bear feet!)
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man was shipwrecked with his dog and a sheep on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Everytime the man moved close to the sheep, his dog would snarl and growl at him. One day while walking the island he discovered a lovely naked lady who also had just become marooned. "Finally, some company!" he thought. While sitting on the shore and the watching the sunset with his new female friend, he slowly leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Hey, could you go walk the dog?"
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, dog
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