The best animal jokes

Two Bear Hunters Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin. The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another one!"
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, hunting
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast. Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods... Cats have never forgotten this. Here's proof that Cats are smarter than dogs... You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God! Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.My husband said it was him or the cat... I miss him sometimes. Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why did the elephant paint himself diffrent colours? A: So he could hide in the crayon box!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: What do you get if you mix a rabbit and a snake? A: A jump rope!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do rabbits put in their computers? Hoppy disks.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, computer
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, husband, men
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man was shipwrecked with his dog and a sheep on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Everytime the man moved close to the sheep, his dog would snarl and growl at him. One day while walking the island he discovered a lovely naked lady who also had just become marooned. "Finally, some company!" he thought. While sitting on the shore and the watching the sunset with his new female friend, he slowly leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Hey, could you go walk the dog?"
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, dog
Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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has 38.91 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, duck
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