The best animal jokes

What do rabbits put in their computers? Hoppy disks.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, computer
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a spider? A harenet.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal
Did you hear about Mike Tyson's horse? It got angry and bit at the champ!
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, celebrity, sport
A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, time
What happened to the frog's car when his parking meter expired? It got toad!!
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
What color socks do bears wear? (They don't wear socks, they have bear feet!)
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man was shipwrecked with his dog and a sheep on a tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Everytime the man moved close to the sheep, his dog would snarl and growl at him. One day while walking the island he discovered a lovely naked lady who also had just become marooned. "Finally, some company!" he thought. While sitting on the shore and the watching the sunset with his new female friend, he slowly leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Hey, could you go walk the dog?"
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, dog
I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.
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has 39.21 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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has 39.12 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, cowboy, death
A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver looked at the child and blurted out, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" Infuriated, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. "The bus driver insulted me," she fumed. The man sympathized and said, "Why, he shouldn't say things to insult passengers. He could be fired for that." "You're right," she said. "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind!" "That's a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey."
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has 38.50 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, kids, ugly
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