Why didn't the teddy bear eat his lunch?
(Because he was stuffed!)
Two rabbits are in a garden and one of the rabbits says, "Thith carrot tathes pithy."
The other rabbit says, "Yes, I know, I just pithed on it."
Two Bear Hunters
Two men went bear hunting.
While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear.
He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it.
The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.
He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step.
Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat.
Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.
The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another one!"
What do you call a frog with no legs?
It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods...
Cats have never forgotten this.
Here's proof that Cats are smarter than dogs...
You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.
Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.
People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life.Dogs believe they are human.
Cats believe they are God!
Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel.
I got rid of my husband.
The cat was allergic.My husband said it was him or the cat...
I miss him sometimes.
Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit!
Q: Why did the elephant paint himself diffrent colours?
A: So he could hide in the crayon box!
Q: What do you get if you mix a rabbit and a snake?
A: A jump rope!
What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer?
A full bull.
What do rabbits put in their computers?
Hoppy disks.
The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.