The best animal jokes

Why do cows wear bells around their necks? Because their horns don't work.
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How did the calf's final exam turn out? Grade A.
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How do bulls drive their cars? They steer them.
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What is a cow's favorite lunch meat? Bullogna.
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What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space? Steer Wars.
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What do you call a rabbit who is real cool? A hip hopper.
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What is the difference between a crazy bunny and a counterfeit banknote? One is bad money and the other is a mad bunny.
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On the show Man v.s Wild, when they talk about the profesionals that Bear recieves help from, they are refering to Chuck Norris.
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Where do rabbits settle their legal disputes? In a pellet court!
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A man takes his hamster to the vet, and after a short look at the creature the vet pronounces it dead. Not happy with the vet's diagnosis the man asks for a second opinion. The vet gives a whistle and in strolls a Labrador dog. The dog nudges the hamster around with its nose and sniffs it a couple of times before shaking his head. "There" says the vet," Your hamster is dead". Still not happy the man asks for a third opinion. The vet opens the back door and in bounds a cat. The cat jumps onto the table and looks the hamster up and down for a few minutes before looking up and shaking it's head. "It's definitely dead sir", says the vet. Convinced, the man enquires how much he owes. "That will be L1000, please". "A L1000 just to tell me my hamster is dead" fumes the man. "Well", says the vet, "There's my diagnosis, the lab report and the cat scan".
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More jokes about: animal, death, doctor