Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A: A civil serpent.
Psychiatrist: "What’s your problem?"
Patient: "I think I’m a chicken."
Psychiatrist: "How long has this been going on?"
Patient: "Ever since I was an egg!"
As horses say to one another.
Any friend of yours is a palomino!
What do headmasters and bullfrogs have in common?
Both have big heads that consist mostly of mouth.
A man enters a little country store and sees a sign reading, ‘Danger!
Beware of Dog’.
He then sees an old hound dog lying asleep on the floor.
‘Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?’ says the man to the shopkeeper.
‘Yep,’ replies the shopkeeper.
‘Before I posted that sign, everyone kept tripping over him.’
How do you go about hiring a horse?
Try two pairs of stilts!
Customer: "Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup."
Waiter: "So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?"
What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare brain.
Yo' Mama is so fat, when she went to KFC, she ordered the bucket of chicken on the roof.
Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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