What do you get if you cross a bottle of water with an electric eel?
A bit of a shock really.
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If toast always lands butter-side down and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast to the back of a cat and drop it?
What weighs 35 tons, has four fuzzy ears and is 80 million years old?
Two rabbits riding a brontosaurus.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well-armed.
Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore.
"Do you have any idea why?"
"Well, I had sex with an elephant!"
"You did?
But elephants are known to have small penises!"
"Yeah, but he fingered me first."
What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache?
A bad mood.
What's an octopuses favourite latin saying?
Squid pro quo.
Q:Why do dogs stick their noses in women's crotches?
A:Because they can.
Q: Why can't you take a turkey to church?
A: Because they use such FOWL language.
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