The best animal jokes

Q: What do you call a naked deer? A: Buck naked!
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
I feel like every nature documentary is directed by a psychopath. "Here's the cutest baby animal ever." "Now let's watch something eat it."
Vote: has 62.58 % from 140 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dead baby, death
A skunk and a rabbit were running through the woods and accidentally they collided with each other. They both got amnesia from the crash. "Who am I? What am I?" said the rabbit confused. "Well, you're one such... with a short tail, long ears..." "I guess!" shouted the rabbit, "I'm a rabbit!" "And what am I?" asked the skunk. "Ah! Yes. You're one such hairy, smelly, with a strip in the middle..." "Wow!", yelled the skunk, "Probably I'm an ass!"
Vote: has 62.50 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
Vote: has 62.50 % from 27 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
Two flies sit on a pile of poop. One fly passes gas. The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
Vote: has 62.44 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, disgusting, food
A man went to work for a zoo veterinarian. "Look in the lion's mouth," the vet told him. "How do I do that?" he asked. "Carefully," replied the vet.
Vote: has 62.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost!
Vote: has 62.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal
A boy asks his mother for breakfast. She says, "Not until you feed the animals." The boy goes outside and says to the chicken, "I don't feel like feeding you today." So he kicks the chicken. He does the same with the cow and the pig. The boy goes back into the house and tells his mother that he's hungry. His mother says, "I saw you kick the chicken, so you're not getting any eggs, I saw you kick the cow, so you're not getting any milk, and I saw kick the pig, so you're not getting any bacon." Just then the boy's father walks down the steps, trips and kicks the cat. The boy says, "Mom, should I tell him?"
Vote: has 62.38 % from 95 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, cat, food
Q: Why can't black kids play in the the sandbox? A: Because the cats keep covering them up.
Vote: has 62.33 % from 381 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black people
A man walks into his house with a duck under his arm. He walks up to his wife with it and says, "This is the pig I've been f*cking'." His wife says, "That's a duck." He quickly replies, "I wasn't talking to you."
Vote: has 62.30 % from 165 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dirty, wife


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