Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat? He had to get a new goat.
What do you get when you try to cross a pit bull with a computer? A lot of bites.
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost!
Two goldfish are in a tank. One said to the other: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
What did the male squirrel say when the female attacked him... Get away from my nuts.
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion? A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, when I walked past your fence, she came out barking.