The best animal jokes

What's a cow's favorite moosical note? Beef-flat!
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, music
That tornado damage your cow barn any? Dunno. Haven't found the durn thing yet.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, weather
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you? Your calves.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, family
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
What game do little cows like to play? Moonopoly.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, game
A Shark alarm at Sydney’s Bondi Beach sent everyone rushing from the water –except for three young boys who didn’'t hear the siren. Onlookers were horrified to see a dorsel fin moving fast towards them. Suddenly, a tall bloke took a deep breath, dived into the surf, swam past the shark, and scooped up two of the boys, swiftly bringing them to the shore and safety. He then took another deep breath and swam out again, snatching the third boy before rapidly approaching, before the monster could attack. Then got him back to the beach in one piece. The heroic bloke then put a knife between his clenched teeth, swam out to the shark, and killed it in a furious battle. As he staggered out from the surf, bleeding and battered, a journalist raced up to him and said, “That was the most heroic thing I’'ve ever witnessed mate. This will appear on the front page of tomorrow’s newspaper: “Aussie hero saves three boys from killer shark!” “Thanks.” Smiles the fella, “but I'’m not an Aussie. I'’m a British backpacker.” “No worries,” said the journalist with a frown, “it'’ll still be front-page news.” The next day, the newspaper’s headline screamed, “Pommy bastard kills boy'’s pet fish!”
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
Why was the little bear so spoiled? Because its mother panda d to its every whim.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
If they made a movie starring the Loch Ness monster and the great white shark from Jaws, what would the movie be called? Loch Jaws.
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has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What is the difference between an pilot and a pig? The pig doesn't turn into a pilot when it's drunk.
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has 58.67 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: air force, animal, drunk
Q: Why didn't go Noah fishing? A: He only had two worms.
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has 58.58 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: animal, bible, fish
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