Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
What's a skunk's favourite game in school? Show and smell.
What is a dolphin's favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It was escaping from K.F.C.
Mother to little boy: ‘Stop pulling the cat’s tail.’ Boy: ‘I’m not. I’m just holding it. It’s the cat that’s doing the pulling.’
Q: Why do pandas like old movies? A: Because they are black and white.
What do cows get when they do all their chores? Mooney.
What's a moo hoo for a cow barn on a holiday? A merry dairy.
What is a moo hoo for steak that came late? Filet delay.
What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor? Ground Beef.