Q: Did you hear her eyes were blue?
A: Yeah, one blew this way, one blew that way...
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A blind man with a guide dog comes to a town square, takes the dog by the tail and starts whirling him around.
„What on earth are you doing?!" asks a passer-by.
The blind man replies, „Nothing, just looking around a bit."
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Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL?
A: Sir, we were able to save her!
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Guy having sex says "damn bitch, there should be a law against sex this good."
To which the girl replies "I think there is daddy..."
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One step forward, 12 floors down.
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Q: Why did the cannibal tax auditor get disciplined?
A: For buttering up her clients.
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First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?"
Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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Q: What did Hitler get his granddaughter for her 5th birthday?
A: An easy bake oven.
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There was a 3 car accident in Mexico yesterday, 84 people were found dead.
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How do you stop an Iraqi tank?
"Just shoot the guy that's pushing it!"
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