The best black humor jokes

Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel? A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning.
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has 64.09 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, morbid
Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart? A: With a knife.
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has 64.05 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: black humor
Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex? A: Lefty.
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has 64.03 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: black humor, communication, dinosaur
Q: How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof? A: Depends on how thin you slice them.
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has 63.96 % from 390 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.
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has 63.93 % from 322 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, morbid
A man with no legs is lying on the beach, when three attractive blondes approach him. The first blonde says to him "I bet you've never been hugged before." The legless man shakes his head. Then the second blonde says, "I bet you've never been kissed before." The legless man shakes his head again. Then the third blonde says, "I bet you've never been fucked before." The legless man says, "No." The third blonde replies, "Well you are now because the tide is coming in!"
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has 63.93 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: black humor
Knock-knock Who is there? A shattered penis with many diseases. What kind of illness? Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis... Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
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has 63.91 % from 605 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
Q: What do pregnant teenagers and their unborn babies have in common? A: Both their moms are going to kill them!
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has 63.68 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, death, morbid, teen
So it's the weekend, and I'm on my back patio when I get this idea to call up my coroner friend Bob. "Bob's not here," his wife says, "he's at work." "Sheesh!" I think. "Poor guy doing autopsies on a Sunday." So I call him on his cell. "What gives, bro,?" I ask. "Homicide," he says. "The higher-ups need a report ASAP. I'll be starting in just a few minutes." I Josh Bob a little. "I'll be thinking of you, buddy. Right now, I'm basting barbecue sauce on a rack of baby-backs and I'm getting ready to open a frosty beer." "Not much different here," he says. "I'm about ready to crack open a cold one myself."
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has 63.45 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food, friendship, time, work
Q: Why did Hitler kill himself? A: He saw his gas bill.
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has 63.45 % from 303 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, jewish, money, morbid
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