First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
Q: Did you hear her eyes were blue? A: Yeah, one blew this way, one blew that way...
Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel? A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning.
Q: Did you hear the joke about an Earthquake and Japanese nuclear reactor? A: Not cool.
There was a 3 car accident in Mexico yesterday, 84 people were found dead.
One step forward, 12 floors down.
Q: What's faster than the speed of light? A: A jew passing Germany.
Q: Why are Germans bad cooks? A: The only good one killed himself.
A man with no legs is lying on the beach, when three attractive blondes approach him. The first blonde says to him "I bet you've never been hugged before." The legless man shakes his head. Then the second blonde says, "I bet you've never been kissed before." The legless man shakes his head again. Then the third blonde says, "I bet you've never been fucked before." The legless man says, "No." The third blonde replies, "Well you are now because the tide is coming in!"
What's the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off.