How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred?
On the fingers!
What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ?
A Pedophiles ass.
How did the tugboat get AIDS?
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad.
Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"
What did the cannibal say when he was full?
I couldn't eat another mortal.
Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter?
It sure gave them something to chew over.
How do you get a baby to run faster?
Chase it with the lawn mower.
An Arabic kid joined my football team.
All he did was blow the plays.
Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
What do you call a dead baby with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
Art.