What do you call of 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor.
How do you make a dead baby float? Take your foot off of it’s head.
What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals? A bus load of babies on fire.
Q: What is height of Suicide? A: A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.
Q: Where did OP go in the explosion? A: Everywhere.
How do the fairy-tales of the whites and the blacks differ? The stories of whites start: Once upon a time... The stories of blacks start: Yo, man, you won't believe what a f**k has happened to me...
Q: What did the baby say as I threw it in the blender? A: I didn't catch it, I was too busy masturbating.
My previous girlfriend had this weird sleeping disorder - in the middle of every night she would wake up and suck my dick. No wonder her dad did not want her to move out.
Q: What do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? A: Not enough sand.
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a paunch!