The best blonde jokes

Q: Why was the blonde late for work? A: She was stranded on the broken escalator.
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has 76.70 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: blonde, work
A blonde biology student conducts an experiment on grasshoppers. She pulls off one of its legs at a time and yells, "Hop." The grasshopper hops each time until all of its legs are gone. The blonde concludes: when all the legs of a grasshopper are removed, it becomes deaf.
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has 76.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: blonde, science, student
One day 2 blondes decided to drive to Disney Land. When they saw a sign that said 'Disney Land left' they turned around and went home.
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has 76.66 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: blonde, travel
A blonde bought a brand new car and decided to drive down from some place far off, to meet this friend. She reached there in a few hours. After spending a few days there, she decided to return, and called up her mother to expect her in the evening. But she didn't reach home in the evening and not the next day either. When she finally reached home on the third day, her distraught mother ran and asked her what happened? She got out, obviously very tired from a long journey, and said, "These car designers are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for going back!"
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has 76.59 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, stupid, time, travel
A woman yells to a blonde walking along a river, "How do I get on the other side!?" The blonde says, "You are on the other side!"
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has 76.56 % from 195 votes. More jokes about: blonde, women
What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant? I hope it's not mine.
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has 76.31 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section. The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-piolet that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beatiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Detroit."
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has 76.11 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two blondes wait at a bus stop. A bus pulls up and opens the door. One of the blondes leans inside and asks the driver, "Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?" The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I'm sorry." The other blonde leans inside and asks, "How about ME?"
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has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Why did the blond layout on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight? A: She wanted to get a dark tan.
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has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: beauty, blonde, stupid
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.
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has 76.01 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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