The best blonde jokes

What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant? I hope it's not mine.
has 76.08 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A man and a blonde are at an ATM. The man says "I know you'r pincode, it's ****" and the blonde says "No it's not! It's 4829!"
has 76.00 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday morning? Tell her a joke on Friday night.
has 75.92 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: blonde
I offered a blonde a penny for her thoughts... she gave me change!
has 75.91 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: blonde, money
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
has 75.90 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, stupid, travel
Two blondes were shopping at the mall. When they were done, they went out to their car, an awesome leather-interior convertible, but they realized they had locked the keys in the car. So they both kind of stood there and thought for a while. Then one of the girls had the bright idea to try to open the car with a coat hanger, so she started fiddling with the lock. The other blonde looked up at the sky, became very worried, and pleaded, "Hurry, hurry! It's going to rain and we left the top down!"
has 75.89 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the mirror have 6 holes in it? A blonde tried to shoot herself!
has 75.73 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capitol building. Unfortunately, she couldn't find it, so she asked a police officer for directions, "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?" The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It'll take you right there." She thanked the officer and he drives off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop. The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus. That was three hours ago. Why are you still waiting?" The blonde replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now. The 45th bus just went by!"
has 75.65 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop, time, travel
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a deserted island together. The island is 20 miles from the nearest inhabited island so they all decide to try to swim there. The redhead makes it 10 miles, is exhausted, gives up, and drowns. The brunette makes it 15 miles before she's too tired to go any farther and drowns. The blonde gets 19 miles away from the deserted island, decides she's too tired to go any farther, and swims all the way back to the deserted island.
has 75.65 % from 192 votes. More jokes about: blonde, desert island, ginger, stupid, travel
Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, “Excuse me, ladies, I’d like to see your fishing licenses.” “We don’t have any,” replied the first blonde. “Well, if you’re going to fish, you need fishing licenses,” said the Game Warden. “But officer,” replied the second blonde, “we aren’t fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we’re collecting debris off the bottom of the river.” The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. “Well, I know of no law against it,” said the Game Warden. “Take all the debris you want.” And with that, he left. As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. “What a dumb Fish Cop,” the second blonde said to the other two. “Doesn’t he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?”
has 75.60 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: blonde, cop, fish
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