A blonde complains to a brunette friend that her Internet is down. The brunette friend offers to let the blonde check her e-mail at her house. "That's OK," says the blonde. "Why don't you check it and forward me what I got?"
Be careful never to let a blonde have a coffee break... It takes too long to retrain her afterwards!
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde? A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
One day, a blonde goes into a store. She gets an item and walks up to the cashier. She says,"I'd like to buy this TV". He says,"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes". The next day, she dyes her hair red and goes back in the store, but the same thing happens. Finally, she shaves her head and goes back in. When she tries to buy it for the third time, the man refuses. She says, "How the hell do you know I'm blonde?". He replied, "First of all, that's a microwave."
What's a difference between a blond and a mosquito? once you smack a mosquito it stops sucking
Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."
Why did the blonde go to KFC? She heard she could get a pair of breasts for $1.99.
A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor. "Doc, I'm afraid my typewriter is pregnant." The doctor asks, "Why in the world would you think that?" She says, "Because it's started missing its period."
Q: Why did the blonde go to the dentist? A: Someone dented her car.