A blonde comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. ‘Yoo-hoo!’ she shouts. ‘How can I get to the other side?’ The other blonde looks around then shouts back, ‘You are on the other side!’
What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? ‘It’s okay, Daddy, I’m not hurt.’
How does a blonde answer the question, ‘Are you sexually active?’ ‘No, I just lie there.’
This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, 'Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes...'
A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis." The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
Q. Did you hear about the blonde lesbian? A. She kept having affairs with men!
Q: There are 17 blonds standing outside a disco but why couldn't they get in? A: The sign said "must be 18 to enter".
Q: Why is it OK for blondes to catch cold? A: They don't have to worry about blowing their brains out.
A blonde in a bar is hunched over her martini spearing at the olive with a cocktail stick. A dozen times the olive eludes her until a man sitting next to her grabs the stick and skewers it for her. ‘That’s the way to do it,’ he says. ‘Big deal,’ replies the blonde. ‘You’d never have got it unless I’d tired it out first.’
How do you change a blonde’s mind? Blow in her ear.