What is the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?
A washing machine doesn't follow you around for three weeks after you dump your load into it.
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor.
"Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams inagony.
She pushes her knee and screams,pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?"
She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."
"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken
What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
"You keep hearing about them, but never see any."
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10?
A. She picks up her purse and goes home.
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it, and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”
To which she replied, “There certainly is!”
My stupid computer keeps saying, “You’ve got mail!”
Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours?
A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.
A blonde wanders into a library and says, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’
The librarian says, ‘I’m sorry, but this is a library.’
The blonde whispers, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’
What are the six worst years in a blonde’s life?
Third grade.
What’s five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A blonde parade.
Why did the blonde roast a chicken for three and a half days?
The instructions said ‘cook it for half an hour per pound’, and she weighed 125.