What can save a dying blonde? Hair transplants.
Chuck Norris drives in reverse and still drives better than you...
A blonde goes horseback riding for the first time in her life, she's never had any prior lessons or training. As soon as her bottom hits the saddle, the horse gallops away. Immediately the girl realizes she's not in the saddle correctly and she does everything she can to stay on the horse, she pulls on the horse's mane, she grabs the saddle ... but she realizes it's no use. Finally she decides the best thing to do is to jump clear of the horse but as she does this, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup and she is dragged by the horse. Her head is hitting the ground ... thump ... thump ... thump ... over and over again. Just as she is about to lose consciousness ..... the store manager runs out and unplugs the horse!
What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? "You keep hearing about them, but never see any."
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10? A. She picks up her purse and goes home.
Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.
A blonde wanders into a library and says, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’ The librarian says, ‘I’m sorry, but this is a library.’ The blonde whispers, ‘Can I have a burger and fries?’
What’s the difference between a blonde and a 747? Not everyone’s been in a 747.
What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!