The best blonde jokes

Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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has 20.71 % from 240 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex
How do blondes pierce their ears? They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
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has 20.39 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: Why are blondes like cornflakes ? A: Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What is the definition of gross ignorance? A: 144 blondes.
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has 20.20 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How come you don’t find stupid brunettes anywhere? Because they all painted themselves blond.
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has 19.95 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde
There was a blonde a redhead and a brunette running from a cop. They hide in potato sacks. The officer kicks each bag....when he kicks the redheads bag she goes meow....when he kick the brunettes bag she goes ruff...when he kicks the blondes bag she goes potatoes!
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has 19.11 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, cop, ginger
A blonde is driving down the road and she sees a dead rabbit. She stops the car and called out, "Does anybody got any hairspray!?" A man pulls up and gives her a bottle of spray and she sprays it on the dead rabbit and the man stares and says "Why u doing that?" The blonde says "Hairspray is for dead hairs"
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has 19.08 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, death, stupid
One day a blonde woman entered an autobody shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car. The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need him to fixed all the dents. He said she could fix them herself by blowing into the tailpipe as hard as she could and they’d all pop out. The woman went home and proceeded to get down on her hands and knees in the driveway. She was blowing into the pipe as hard as she could and her face was turning purple when another blonde woman walked by and asked what she was doing. After hearing the whole story the second blonde pauses for a moment then responds, “Hello! The windows are down. Your personal check for the full $30,000.”
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has 18.53 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, mechanic, money
Q: Why can't you tell blondes knock-knock jokes? A: Because they leave to go answer the door.
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has 17.64 % from 541 votes. More jokes about: blonde, knock-knock
Q. Why do blondes have legs? A1. So they don't get stuck to the ground. A2. To get between the bedroom and the kitchen. A3. So they don't leave trails, like little snails.
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has 17.63 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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