The best blonde jokes

A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. "Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time: a brown curly wig, big baggy clothes, and big sunglasses. Then she waited a few days before she approached the salesman again and said, "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied. Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?" "Because that's a microwave," he replied.
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde, customer service, technology
What do bleached blondes and jumbo jets have in common? Black boxes.
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has 20.26 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
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has 20.02 % from 230 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex
One day a blonde woman entered an autobody shop claiming that she’d suffered extensive damage to her new car. The mechanic thought he’d have some fun with her so he told her that she didn’t need him to fixed all the dents. He said she could fix them herself by blowing into the tailpipe as hard as she could and they’d all pop out. The woman went home and proceeded to get down on her hands and knees in the driveway. She was blowing into the pipe as hard as she could and her face was turning purple when another blonde woman walked by and asked what she was doing. After hearing the whole story the second blonde pauses for a moment then responds, “Hello! The windows are down. Your personal check for the full $30,000.”
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has 19.69 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, mechanic, money
Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over a 100 miles per hour. "Hey," asked the brunette at the wheel, "see any cops following us?" The blonde turned around for a long look. "As a matter of fact, I do." "Oh, NOOOO!" yelled the brunette. "Are his flashers on?" The blonde turned around again. "Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."
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has 19.53 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop
Q: Why are blondes like cornflakes ? A: Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.
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has 19.53 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q. Why did the dum blond keep failing her driver's test? A. Because every time the door opened, she jumped into the back seat.
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has 19.47 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car
How do blondes pierce their ears? They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
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has 19.07 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: blonde
How does a blonde turn on the light after sex? She opens the car door.
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has 19.07 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why do blondes clean their hair in the sink? Because that’s where your supposed to wash vegetables.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde
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