Chuck Norris is allowed to draw pictures of Mohammad.
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a paunch!
Why is it so sad that Steve Jobs died? Everyone at Apple are crying their's out!
Growing up, Samuel L. Jackson didn't have a mother and a father. He had a mother and a motherf*cker.
Superman's weakness isn't kryptonite, it's obvious who it is...
Justin Timberlake didn't bring sexy back Chuck Norris did.
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan? A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.