Chuck Norris made Ellen Degeneres straight.
Willow Smith is 11 and has a tongue ring, half her head shaved and is bisexual. She needs to go live with her Aunty and Uncle in Bel-Air.
Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
Did you hear about Mike Tyson's horse? It got angry and bit at the champ!
Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses? He was a rough rider!
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Abraham Lincoln can finish a play better than the 2013 Broncos.
Bruce lee does not drink water, he drinks WATAAAA.
Why is it so sad that Steve Jobs died? Everyone at Apple are crying their's out!
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...