The best chemistry jokes

Money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element. The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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has 62.79 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, divorce, money
Q: What element is a girl's future best friend? A: Carbon.
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has 60.76 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, friendship, nerd, women
Q: What is the most important rule in chemistry? A: Never lick the spoon!
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has 60.67 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, life
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I think I've lost an electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first says, "Yes, I'm positive..."
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has 60.66 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, chemistry, science
Q: What happens when spectroscopists are idle? A: They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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has 56.92 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, communication, nerd
Q: What do you get when you complete science class? A: A graduated cylinder.
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has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, graduation, science
When chemist die, they barium.
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has 55.57 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: chemistry
As an ion chromatography chemist I made this one up: Anions aren't negative, they're just misunderstood.
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has 51.86 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: chemistry
Yo mama farts so much there is a reason why Jupiter is made out of gas.
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has 48.41 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, fart, science, Yo mama
Little Johnny was a chemist. Little Johnny is no more. What he thought was H2O was H2SO4.
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has 47.42 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, death, little Johnny, stupid
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