Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
Hercules strangled two snakes in his crib when he was a baby. Chuck Norris strangled a grizzly bear moments after birth with his own umbilical cord.
Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
When Chuck Norris first saw Dragon Ball Z he thought it was a series of easy workout videos.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.