The original plan for Hiroshima and Nagasaki was to send in Chuck Norris. We decided to go the humane route.
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
Chuck Norris doesn't blow out brithday candles, they surrender their flames willingly.
Anybody can outdo the impossible, but nobody can outdo Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
Lays chips claims "No one can eat just one". Wrong. Chuck Norris ate ONE, laughed then ate a whole bag of Doritos.
Why did satan die before judgment day, Chuck hated him.
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror nothing appears. There can never be a second Chuck Norris.