The best Chuck Norris jokes

15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest? I don't know he is still busy.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed. She is now known as Britney Spears.
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Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
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Chuck Norris can walk up a down elavator.
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Chuck Norris doesn't contribute to global warming, he exhales pure oxygen.
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Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
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Chuck Norris already has Final Fantasy XXI.
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Superman and The Flash have a race around the world. Who wins? Chuck Norris.
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Once, on the set of Walker Texas Ranger, a goat fell over dead. Chuck Norris ran up to the goat and beard rubbed it back to life.
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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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