Cocaine is Addicted to Chuck Norris.
The Yeti can't be found because it Chuck Norris made sure no one ever finds it.
A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
Chuck Norris made Stevie Wonder flinch.
Chuck Norris went sky diving 50 times. He used a parachute twice.
Electricity pays Chuck Norris to light up his house.
Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.