Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris enters a sauna the sauna starts sweating.
Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder.
Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky.
Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
Chuck Norris became a firefighter, after hearing of his decision fire ceased to be an element.
What's the last thing that goes through your mind when you fight Chuck Norris?
His foot.
Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.