When Chuck Norris visits Africa, the animals are required to stay in their cars.
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
The goal of life is living in agreement with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is proof that legends never die.
Underneath China it says "Made in Chuck Norris".
One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart. The clerk told him to have a nice day. The next day the clerk was found dead. The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why. He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
Chuck Norris is never late... time is just early.
In the Matrix, the bullets try to dodge Chuck Norris - and fail.